Shit I Say in Real Life: My Pseudonym

I get a lot of questions about whether or not I’m like this in real life.  People assume that because I’m a writer, somehow all of my snark is well thought out in advance.  The truth couldn’t be farther from that if I tried.  The reality is that my blog, my Facebook page, and conversations I have with friends in real life are largely made up of a severe form of word vomit that I have yet to name.  In fact, I hope they name the condition after me.

**All of these blog posts are transcriptions of real conversations I’ve had with friends.  All friends involved are aware of this series and have given me prior approval to include our conversations in the series.  I NEVER share a conversation without permission and names are not used to be polite.  And because because most people don’t want to admit that I am their friend.



Me: I actually spend more of my time as Jane than my real self

Her: Does that make you Jane?

Me: I forget that it’s not my real name.  Sometimes when people say Jane in public I almost answer

Her: Which identity is real


Her: That’s so so funny

Me: I’m basically a really REALLY organized schizophrenic

Her: HAHAHA with paperwork and to do lists

Me: I don’t think it can count as dissociative identity disorder since my personalities are aware of each other.